Kids Need to Grow, So Let Go

From the time we see our little one for the first time and hold them in our arms, there is something inside us that vows to care for and protect them all the days of our lives. There is a deep, instant commitment to this little person. It’s a commitment that no matter what comes, you the parent will try your hardest and best to make every situation good.

Interesting that’s what God does for us, too. Romans 8:28 says that He works all things to the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose. Interesting… It’s built into us, too. Must be a parenting thing!

What would happen, though, if you shelter your kids from everything? What would they learn? If you never let go of the bike for them to ride by themselves, they won’t know what happens when you stop paying attention, lose your balance, and feel a scraped up knee. You can try your best to explain it ahead of time, hoping that they avoid a fall. However, there is something about falls that makes us REALLY “get it” and learn what NOT to do, more so than someone just telling us.

And what about bad choices they make, like choosing to watch a movie instead of finishing their homework. They have made a choice that has consequences attached. If we constantly jump in and intervene, our kids are hearing us, but are not learning and growing.

To be honest, I struggle with this concept with my daughter. Her physical abilities are less than her mental abilities. She wants to help and wants to do her portion of chores and keeping things tidy. However, knowing how easily she can fall, I struggle with when to hang on, when to do it myself, and when to just let her go to do it on her own. Special needs magnifies the need for growth and the need to release.

We need to be willing to let go, when the time is right, and let them make their own choices. Of course, as a mom or dad, you warn them of pitfalls and obstacles along the way. You pray for them, that they steer clear of potholes and hurdles. They aren’t going to live with you forever, though. One day, maybe many, many years from now, they will be out on their own, with a job, a house, even a family of their own. You need to train and teach them as much as you can now, so life is easier and better for them when they do step out alone.

Don’t be afraid to let them grow. Don’t be afraid of a scraped knee. They heal. Don’t hold SO tight that they can’t pick themselves back up.

Encourage. Love. Support. Protect. Release.

God has them in His hands.

Each stage of children’s lives brings new challenges and new pathways to growth. Where are your kids and how can you encourage them and let them go to learn at the same time?

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JessBio200 Kids Need to Grow, So Let GoJessica Stone is a wife, mom to 4, and owner of her own businesses in the fitness and essential oils industries. She has 3 special needs children, one which has an undiagnosed neuro-muscular condition that limits her mobility, and her twins are currently receiving therapy for sensory defensiveness, physical mobility, fine motor skills, and speech. She enjoys sharing what she has learned through her trials, experience, research, and tools that have helped her children’s health with other parents who are looking for support, encouragement, and helpful information. Get her FREE gift to you, 30 Easy Snacks Your Kids Will Devour: Eating Healthy Never Got So Simple, to help you feed your kids quick & healthy! Connect with Jess live today on Facebook!

Kids Need to Grow, So Let Go

16 thoughts on “Kids Need to Grow, So Let Go

  1. Great post, Jessica. That protection thing flows over into Gramma’s even though we’ve been through it with our own children. Letting them go and risk scraping that knee goes against our protectiveness but certainly does wonders for helping them overcome and stand on their own according to their abilities at the time.

  2. My ex wife (like most moms I suspect) is having the hardest time with this now that the boys are in their teens. I think with men it totally depends on whether or not it’s a boy (no problem) or girl (big problem!). Great post!

    1. Interesting take on this from a male perspective! My dad felt the opposite. He was SO glad he had 3 girls and no boys because he wasn’t sure he’d be able to handle a boy (or the boy handle him). lol God gives you what you need, that’s for sure.

  3. Reading this article led me to a verse in the Bible. Deuteronomy 32:11 “He was like an eagle hovering over its nest, overshadowing its young. Then spreading its wings, lifting them into the air, teaching them to fly.”

    Great post on letting go, Jessica.

  4. It certain brings more challenges to you as a mother to have be able to let your children do their things, like you said with your daughter. I can see how difficult that must be at times, but I commend you for working it out that they learn life themselves by making their choices.

  5. Letting go is the hardest thing for a parent. But it is so very important. How does that saying go??? If you love someone, you have to love them enough to set them free. With guidance, of course, and they will be alright. Trusting God with your children is a true measure of faith!

  6. I smiled to myself as soon as I read this title. And nodded in agreement. With the best parenting instincts in the world it is still difficult to let go of our ‘babies’. But how much harder can it be when you have a child with special needs. My heart goes out to you Jessica because you face such special challenges. But your faith shines through!

  7. I had never before considered how having special needs child intensifies the protect/release need. You really hit on our core nature as mothers to protect… while at the same time desiring to see our kids reach their full potential, which can only happen as they stretch and take risks.

    I love how you bring Father God into this, because in my own parenting struggles, I’ve often felt like really all of life is an extension of HIS family! I’m so glad we are never alone in this adventure!

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